Healing with Love is the term that I’ve developed to describe the method that I use when working with people.
To me, “healing with love” means taking away the Judgement that we may have of our own Inner Child. This is the part of us that has experienced trauma, regardless to what degree.
Far too many of us have childhood experiences that to us, as small children, were highly traumatic. But as an adult reflecting back on the experience, we may rationalize or want to diminish the experience and write them off as just simply insignificant.
The Inner Child
When healing past experiences we must always remember that to a child ANY trauma is a Big Deal.
When starting to uncover past hurts it is of the utmost importance to remember, even if you are 50 or 60 years old today, the part of you that is still hurting may be the consciousness of a 3 year-old child. To this Inner Child, a stressed out mother towering above her and screaming is Terrifying!
The person that I’m working with may understand that her mother was a stressed-out single mother. She may even understand that her mother had an undiagnosed mental illness. But this “awareness” belongs to the 50 year-old woman. It is the energy of the 3 year-old child who is still scared and feeling alone that remains trapped within.
Permission to Feel the Feelings
Healing with love means Accepting that the hurt energy of the Inner Child still exists. It means allowing the Inner Child within to have and experience the Terror that they were not allowed to experience as a child.
Too often a parent (or parents) become caught up with their own painful life experiences. In their own pain, they find that they cannot or will not allow their child to experience their own hurt feelings. “I don’t have time for your mess right now!” screams the mother. “Stand up straight. Big boys don’t cry.” shouts the father.
Over and over we hear these statements made to us during our most vulnerable times of our life. We are then surprised that we are unable to express our feelings of vulnerability as adults.
Many men that I work with find it is a precious gift to finally give themselves permission to feel their own feelings. Through a culture that demands a stoic mask, men are often forced to lock away their feelings of fear and vulnerability. But buried feelings never stay buried. Too often these feelings come out in aggressive or self-destructive behaviors, which are simply the cries of the Inner Child calling for acceptance.
When I think of the term, Unconditional Love, I imagine the energy of a mother's acceptance of her infant child. She will love the child regardless of its abilities or accomplishments or even its shortcomings. When we are able to offer this level of love to our own Inner Child, miracles in healing become possible.
The greatest gift of the Soul Healing journey is the gift of Unconditional Love that you will give to your own Inner Child. It is the Acceptance and the Awareness that you exist and that you are worthy of being loved "just as you are" that will be the most precious gift of all.
I invite you to reach out and get started today on your own journey of healing with love.